Sue Me Later

Narcissist Playbook in Divorce: 8 Tactics to Protect Yourself

Hayder Shkara

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 16:15

Going through a high conflict divorce with a narcissist? You’ve probably seen these all too familiar patterns. I’m Hayder Shkara, Australian family lawyer, and in this video I break down what I call the Narcissist Playbook in Divorce - the predictable tactics narcissists use to manipulate, control, and exhaust their former partners.
 
I’ll show you how to recognise things like charm offensives, gaslighting, delays, smear campaigns and using children as leverage, and I’ll share practical ways to respond effectively using evidence, structure and the Biff communication method, (Brief, Informative, Friendly and Firm).
 
If you’re dealing with divorce, property disputes or parenting challenges, this video will help you stay focused on outcomes, protect your children, your finances and your wellbeing, and avoid getting dragged into emotional games.
 
Topics we cover:
Charm offensive and fake calm persona
Gaslighting and rewriting reality
Delay and exhaust tactics
Smear campaigns and using the court for control
Fog of information and the DAVO strategy
Keeping children out of conflict